The Impact Crew: If Marriage Certificates Were Renewable…

How many couples will renew their marriage certificates if it were renewable? I can say this without fear or favour that I can estimate about 90% of marriages collapsing for one reason or the other. The greatest mistake that men often make in this contemporary world of ours is the nature of women or men they do marry. In mans’ attempt to live and make impact, the kind of relationship in which they find themselves or the nature of man or woman they do marry plays a very vital role in determining their ups and downs of life. There is evidence to suggest that relationship or marriage as a matter of fact can be made better when both or one faction takes the pain to accumulate knowledge and pray for the divine intervention of God in its pursuit.

All men are not the same and all women are not the same, so many factors needs to be considered when selecting a life partner. We are often convinced that in selecting a life partner we must look out for someone who loves, caring, good looking, gentle, bold, and financially sound, you can just talk off all the good qualities you can talk of but don’t forget that he or she was created from the same womb not ovens. If this is the kind of marriage partner that you are expecting then it will be preferable for you to create your own. In another breath, other factions also says that both parties must be with the same interest, suitable intellectuality, equal values or standards, high respect for one another, with the same educational qualification only to mention a few. A single person who is of such high expectations in a relationship or marriage is casting ugly crowns.

From an objective and subjective point of view, marriage, more importantly needs to live till the end and not to the walls. Thinking about how overwhelmingly relevant it is to pick the right life partner is like thinking about how to turn tomorrow into today. The two identified unique characteristics that defines an individuals life is his or her environment and hereditary. This is to tell how challenging it is for two individual from different background tends to fuse together as couples. In identifying a life partner, you are choosing a lot of things, including your parenting partner and someone who will deeply influence your children, your eating companion for the rest of your life, your primary leisure time and retirement friend, your career therapist and someone who will hurt you.

This is a clear indication of the inputs that needs to get into the decision making process of selecting a life partner. Choosing a life partner does not depends on ones level on intellect or experience. It is possible that people of high class, otherwise logical and educated elite’s ends up selecting a life partner that tends to leave them in a state of frustrations. Selecting a life partner does not necessarily demand a detailed plan or strategy. Marriage or relationship doesn’t work like a monument constructions. I will advice you leave the plans and strategies to the architects.

Forcing ones way to propose or necessarily marry someone without his or her full commitment to the relationship or marriage is simply wrong. I back this with Biblical evidence as it is made vivid in the book of Genesis 24:58 (NASB) Then they called Rebecca and said to her, “Will you go with this man?” And she said, “I will go”. The sanctity and beauty of marriage needs not be underestimated. Sympathy is a poor substitute for love, relationship or marriage so in selecting ones life partner, there must not be some sort of super power or sympathy. It is simply illogical to marry someone because of his or her fame, money, or materials sake. The book of Colossians also makes this clear in chapter 3:14; “And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity”. How does it feel to live with a dog that you don’t like in your home? How more a life partner?

A wise man is the one who can live with things that probably he or she cannot change. It is human being that counts. If you are in a quest to marry someone who is ‛perfect’ then you are miles away from that perfect imperfect person. People are made by perfect by perfect people. If you look for perfection, you will never be content. For what sort of pool option you have, be it of your choice or not, there is an ideal iota of perfection. Seeking for perfection, demands perfection. The place of meeting a spouse or the state in which you were equals to zero. Love perfects love. I am not against your choice or selection because the honeymoon phase counts. What people usually say is the choice of spouse selection doesn’t matter but I will always advice to go in for someone who you can defend in the highest court of critics. If weeding certificates were renewable, would you renew?

Akwasi Brobbey
(Senior writer and editor at TIC)
[email protected]
0548412192/0266175686